Image provided by: Morrow County Museum; Heppner, OR
About Heppner weekly gazette. (Heppner, Umatilla County, Or.) 1883-1890 | View Entire Issue (March 6, 1884)
o e 'The .heppneR" gizzard, junior. ". ; ft O Grround Out Whenever tTTeMule-Power Press Feels Like It: 0 o o CO THE SETTLER'S FRIEND. m A few years ago a settler got Surveyor Keithley to run out the lines of some land; then he came into Heppner and told Squire Mal Jory he was goingto file on it next day, pointing it out to him on the plats. The squire said: "A-h-h, yes, ys!" That eveing he gave a man $2.50 d ride up anjl get one of his own son'sto come down and lile on the same land. And when the settler called to file, his land hal been gobbled. A-h, yes, yes, yes! old Uncle Gusticus is the set tler's friend.. He had a summons published against a man who had not been sued. On account of his gray hairs, the man let him off pn his promising to publish a full ex planation and. .apology. Did he keep that promise? No. The old man would keep nothing except a settler's dollar. Let the settler say : "Damn such a settler's friend." A DEAJ) give-away. Oovemor-Rca - io-rorkiii -1 i ku th devil for Squire Mallory, ' al though the squire is a fanatical, hidebotod republican and the gov ernor is a rflemocrat. This shows business sense on the part of the governor. You see he is a keen lawyer, and looks at things in a lawyer-like way. As he says himself, the old"squire is easy led. So it follows that if the old squire was allowed to remain UJike mourrier'4sbenclvthe gover nor would have a very soft racket jjMjjng the o old gentleman into making any kind of a decision. The governor tried to get Jack Clark to vote for the souire. but flack, being an hbne!sfcjaf434i4 having a very forcible recollection of some perjury in the Mallory court, said: "To with Mal lory !" Vote for Shobe and Keith--ley, two honest men who ov?n themselves. - Of course S wellhead Hallock wants his poor old uncle again elected justice, so that when the kidis father gets tired of support ing him, he can go and bum" his grub off the uncle. The old fanatic is easy led, and might evenebe in dueell to feed a dead beat. Vote for Jim Fuller for county commissioner. ' A rote for Bushee is a vote for an hon est and competent man. FIRE HIM OUT.. It seems that Old Squire Slal lory has been really reading up on law. So might a hog, for all the good it would do. Yes, the old gentleman has been reading a copy of the general statutes which was borrowed some years' ago from Hon. J. L. Morrow and hrwnever been returned. And from what the squire finds in that borrowed book he seems to think the statutes give him and his little court very long latitude perhaps authority PERSONAL MENTION. We are pleased to announce that Mi. Pettifogger Pain, the sneaking shyster of the Heppner Hills - the bald - headed chimpanzee and slightly-educated idiot who talks in seven different languages and Lthfhks in .none, has gone oVeV'iTo liiiea creek t ttsehisimmense in fluence against the election of Hon. J. L, Morrow and Sir. bx. There maybe a few newcomers camped there who have not yefc Ffeard of this srueaking shyster partner of 1 1. ,0 CC2"r . to send a man to the penitentiary, Jhead Bishop. His rnnyardent or to order him hung. So you fel- admirers, including Squire MaJ- lows who are not well hung better look out. Squire Mallory's train ers and keepers shqijkl ioy set hiw to studying up some other bor rowed books. Turn him loose 6n Kennedy on Diseases of ihfltfSk'in. Q l m 7 or the History of a Slickear Beef J Barrel. WHO STOLE THE STEEit? Voters, remember that the corrupt re publican machine rint? in Portland have o u tan a a necr u'-p rug i 'umme , 'ut . uh p 1 1 ir u your votes. They have hid tools and tricksters on salary m Umatilla county for two years; they hope to split up the. honest voters of both parties and sneak in their candidates on splits and local is sues; they care nothing abotrt ou ex cept to use you; they started the patent HaWTimes to freeze out afyaper started by the people on legitimate local issues; they.staxted the cayuse bolt at the other end of theTcounty, and hired a pinto to run; they are working every point to sneak in their candidates and stealVi few votes from the real representatives oy.the people, Messrs. Morrow and Cox; Big head Biskop, ShjctfteroPain, Old Bustious J-Msailpryo and. his sucker-mputhed deattJ beat nephew are the tools and stoof pigeons of this corrupt Portland ring. No free republican can afford to bend the knee to such a set of stinkers. Vote for MoxrivgLand Cox. . . o " JUSTICE ORHYSTER? Last summer an old man on Eight Mile bought a pre-emption right, paying with a $10 cayuse. The claim not suit ing, he came to Heppner to enter a civil suit for the recovery of his cayuse, but not being able to put upsts, bquire Mallory advised him to get out a rant and arrest the man for stealing the horse, as costs could then be got out of the county. So the pre-emptor, a good citizen of Dairy Ridge, $as arrested, and nearly every citizen on Shutler Flat was forced to come to Mallory's court as a witness. A respectable manwas held up as a horsethief, a w,Bole community taken from home and business, and the county cinched $180 00, all because a so called "justice" wanted to make pajtry fees. Fjre the old stiff out. lory, .who formerly called him a Imr, thieibandcJi pettifogger, wish him "a pleasa4 trip, and hope that he mayiot fall into jt badger-hole or have his luxuriant locks injured by cruel alkali dust. Acting on the orders of their masters, tlftse lickspittle kids who get up a part of "Bishop's patent outside dishrag, have rapiajak some estracts-troin ..an. article.in. a. rendleton paper or i few years nQ(i and think they have seriously injured Mr. Cox thereby. Those brainless idiots are apt to think they are pulling very large blood puddings when they are only hand ling very small sausages. It would paralyze Jthe community to hear that they'had ever got up anything worth reprinting. Look out for that amerlrneyit racket on the bottom of your bal lot that is the woman siuffrage s business,' and if you want to vote against it, scratch out the wrd yes. PICKLED POUK. A votefor Henry ay isavote thrown away. Vote for Morrow and Cox. I)j,d Bro. Brundage Steal Bill Hughes' Hog ? Every man who has ever worn a blue stripe under his vest knows that pickled pork, when properly put up, is a good, substantial dish. Tie American hog furnishes fine fruit. But in aemi- . civilized country this fruit is not supposed to be exactly wild and free for all to pluck. Bather is it supposed to be a matter of dollars and cents and trade. But according to the talegheing told about Bro. Brundago lie seems to think a hot? is 1 free fruit to be plucked. The story gofs that Bill W7r Hughes had a big gentleman hog worth about $50. The animal was allowed to visit around among the neighbors, and for many months he had be come a power for good in the land, and at each of hissuccessive visits new generations of his de scendants rose up and squealed at his approach. It's a wise pig that knows its own father. But after a while this valuable hog disappeared. And itsowner hasinfVmation to the effect that it was last seencooped up. in Bro. Brundage's pen, from which(j,place it is fv ""sed to have found its way into his pickled inn quarrel. Now, if Bro. Brun dage would be cruel enough to butcher a neigh bor's hog and rvent him from returning to his numerous and devoted wives, he would bo too cruel to ever act as a justice of the peace.a Be sides, Bro. Brundage, whenwriting of himself, e spelled "me" with a big "M," and nobody but Godalhiighty has a right to do that. Voter, pauso and retiect before you waste your ballot on Old Man Brundage. o o & o
